The Best Reason to be Nice
When my wife and I were first married we went on a trip to New York City. We spent a few days there and one day in the midst of sightseeing we visited some stores in Manhattan. We were not really buying anything just “window shopping” or quickly going in and out of the stores. We noticed immediately that we were getting friendly, courteous and attentive service in every single store we went into.
For the sake of context, it should be noted that it was the middle of summer and quite warm in the city. We were dressed in short sleeves and had our baby in a stroller. In other words, not the picture of a wealthy couple doing some high-end shopping.
It did seem to matter at all. We went into Tiffany’s for a quick look around and were warmly greeted by an associate. I mentioned that I might want to look at some watches and she directed to the “watch floor” where another smiling associate was waiting to show us whatever we were interested in. He then spent the next 10-15 minutes showing us watches that we thought my wife would like based on questions he asked her.
He had her try on a number of expensive watches explaining the characteristics of each. We thanked him and left without buying anything after a few minutes. Not only did he remain as friendly as he had been when we came in, but he thanked us for coming in! As we left the store, several associates thanked us for coming in and wished us a good day.
At that point in my career I was not in a position to purchase anything remotely associated with that store and we did not pretend either. It did not matter at all. Every person we spoke to gave us the same warm reception.
My wife and I discussed it later and we remarked on what a pleasure it had been to walk around Manhattan and meet these wonderful people. It eventually occurred to us that the reason we were treated so well was because they treated everyone well. They did not pre-judge or hard sell.
For these people and for everyone, it can be quite easy to be kind to everyone. You never know who you are speaking to, appearances can be deceiving and a billionaire could be dressed as casually an anyone else and you might never know it.
Also, you never know who the person you are speaking to is connected with. There is a story of a woman in the 19th century who came in from the rain into a store in Pittsburgh. A floor salesman came over and asked if he could assist her and she said that she was just waiting for the rain to stop. The young man then brought her a chair so that she would be comfortable. When the rain stopped, he helped up and out into the street. She asked for his card and went on her way. A few months later the store received a letter from Andrew Carnegie addressed to the owner asking that the young man be sent to Scotland to take a huge furniture order! The elderly lady was the Margaret Carnegie, Andrew Carnegie’s mother, one of the wealthiest men in the world.
The point it not to be nice in case you meet someone who is wealthy or can give you something back. The point is to be nice because it is the right thing to do. It makes people feel important and makes you feel special by extension. It can also plant seeds of goodwill and you never know what will come of it.
Being nice costs nothing and pays huge returns. You may never serve the mother of one of the richest people in history, but you will make others feel better about themselves and they will appreciate you for it.